Positive Psychology Column for 3-30-03 By Tom Muha, Ph.D. Dealing with Terror on TV War and terrorism are about death and destruction. Why do we become fixated on our TV sets to witness the carnage? What compels us to expose ourselves to the horrors associated with human suffering? How can anyone even think about achieving happiness when being bombarded by such fearful images? For millions of years human beings have struggled to survive as our very existence has been continually threatened by marauding bands of warring tribesmen. We are biologically hardwired to be responsive to dangerous situations. Those who were not alert to the dangers were eliminated from the gene pool. So it’s little wonder that we feel so much tension when we find ourselves in dangerous times with the government telling us to be on high alert for terrorism and the media broadcasts bringing the most frightful images into our homes. This is our body’s way of preparing us for survival reactions - fight, flight or freeze. Our mind does not differentiate between the actual reality of what is going on right in front of us and the images that we see on TV. Our bodies do not react any differently to situations in which we are in real danger and those dangers that we are observing that are thousands of miles away. When faced with a threat, we are compelled to react to it in order to remove ourselves from the hazardous situation. But if the danger does not, in fact, pose an immanent threat to our safety, then we have other responses that will serve us better in terms of maintaining a sense of well-being. The skills required to survive in modern day living require a shift to higher level responses than the primitive instinct to become angry, fearful or sad.  By using our brainpower rather than our emotions, we can react in ways that will truly protect us from the danger of permitting too much of the negativity in the world to overwhelm us. To protect ourselves and our children, there are three specific steps we can take. First, we can make decisions about what to allow into our minds. Each one of us can control our own thoughts, and by doing so we can control our emotions. In order to shift our thoughts into positive pictures, we must not permit our minds to be polluted by overpowering negative images. That means turning off the TV or changing channels to view something like a situation comedy. Think for a minute about how much information you really need about the bad things that are going on in the world. How many times did you watch the World Trade Centers get blown up? Do you really need to see it dozens of times? Of course not! If you have children, it’s important to minimize their exposure to terrible tragedies. Tell your kids or grandchildren that they are safe, that the problems are far away, and that you will protect them. The second step is to think about what you’d do instead of allowing your mind to be contaminated by horrific visions. You can make choices about what actions to take in constructing your life. The best choices are always those based on your highest values. What do you value most in life? Most of us hold family as one of our highest values. Think about what you could be doing with your family if you weren’t glued to the TV: playing a game, going to the park, or doing whatever has brought your family joy in the past. If there aren’t kids in your life, then focus on what choices you have made in the past that produced happiness for you. Your personal power lies in your ability to make choices. In order to have balance in your life you can choose to minimize the amount of time in front of the TV and fill your life with friends, nature, music, or whatever else will make you happy. The third step is to draw on your faith that the commitments you have made to the higher power and to helping to make the world a better place will ultimately prevail. Do whatever works for you to tap into your spirituality - prayer, a walk in the park, meditation, etc. Having renewed your faith that all will be well in the end, go do something to help someone else. Helping others by volunteering and making monetary contributions is putting the good energy into the world that will bring you the peace of mind that you need in these troubled times.   Tom Muha is a psychologist in Annapolis. He welcomes your comments and questions. To contact him call (443) 454-7274 or email him at tom@achievinghappiness.com.